Okay, so did i sound whiny enough about the state of normal christian life in our little area of suburbia? I shouldnt write at that time of night, and I guessi shouldn't be writing now either, because i am awake on about 4.5 hours of sleep. why am I not in bed? Because I'm dumb. At least my class tomorrow is cancelled- though i do have a test on friday in that class. Its not really a hard class though- its mainly remembering the different sociologists and what they focused on.
So today I received a wedding invitation from my friends nick and em! I'm so excited for them- they've been dating for a million years and are both graduating from college so the timing is really right. Also, this is the first of my close close friends to be married- and its two of them. Friends of mine- obviously- have gotten married before, but this is nick and em- who i doubled with to prom, who we went to OP with, who i went out to east hall with, and they are going to be husband and wife! I can remember when they met- sometimes high school seems like yesterday, but right now it seems like a lifetime ago. I have passed out of contact with a lot of people from that time, and my life doesn't resemble very closely where I thought that I'd be right now. I thought that I'd be done with school (i could've if id stayed at rbc) and in a job in a church. I can say with perfect conviction though that i'm right where i'm supposed to be, which is something that has taken me a while to see. When I'm not faling asleep while trying to work, i really do love my work- and i think that im good at what I do, and i know that i would hate to miss out , now that we're finally going to have a school. angie and I were talking recently about how this would be a good job, preschool in the mornings, plus some before and after schol care, would be perfect, even after I graduate, until I can get my foot in the door with the whole writing gig. Though my dream is to already have my whole body in the door by that point and not have to struggle along too much. And who knows, I might be married by then to some wealthy guy and not have to work that much at all. (Note the trace of sarcasm) Actually, that brings me back to why i originally brought up the whole nick and em thing- I don't have a date. And that makes me want to be a cry baby. Not because I'm super envious and wish it were me instead of them or anything. I just don't want to be the only one from my old crowd that is there and has no one to dance with. Because they'd probably point it out, and each guy would politiely ask me to dance one dance with him, and then id be sitting around the rest of the time. I don't need a boyfriend, what i really need is just someone that i can be comfortable with and feel natural hanging around and dancing with. Thats all. Is that selfish of me? Or needy? I know that God could work in me by having me be alone at the wedding, but it would still be nice to have someone to sit with at least. One more thing to put on my prayer list- I knew it was coming, and I've been praying in preparation. Do I rsvp and say 2 or 1? I have a while 'cause the weddings not till jan 2. I think that my motives are pure in wanting this, and I don't think that i am jealous and needy. I guess I just have to pray that they continue to be so, and that God will help me to accept whatever happens. Man, I'm overdramatic when I'm tired.
Quote:"It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in posession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife." Jane austen - Pride and Prejudice (A book well worthy of reading, and a miniseries well worth seeing all 5 hours of, even if just for Colin Firth!)
So today I received a wedding invitation from my friends nick and em! I'm so excited for them- they've been dating for a million years and are both graduating from college so the timing is really right. Also, this is the first of my close close friends to be married- and its two of them. Friends of mine- obviously- have gotten married before, but this is nick and em- who i doubled with to prom, who we went to OP with, who i went out to east hall with, and they are going to be husband and wife! I can remember when they met- sometimes high school seems like yesterday, but right now it seems like a lifetime ago. I have passed out of contact with a lot of people from that time, and my life doesn't resemble very closely where I thought that I'd be right now. I thought that I'd be done with school (i could've if id stayed at rbc) and in a job in a church. I can say with perfect conviction though that i'm right where i'm supposed to be, which is something that has taken me a while to see. When I'm not faling asleep while trying to work, i really do love my work- and i think that im good at what I do, and i know that i would hate to miss out , now that we're finally going to have a school. angie and I were talking recently about how this would be a good job, preschool in the mornings, plus some before and after schol care, would be perfect, even after I graduate, until I can get my foot in the door with the whole writing gig. Though my dream is to already have my whole body in the door by that point and not have to struggle along too much. And who knows, I might be married by then to some wealthy guy and not have to work that much at all. (Note the trace of sarcasm) Actually, that brings me back to why i originally brought up the whole nick and em thing- I don't have a date. And that makes me want to be a cry baby. Not because I'm super envious and wish it were me instead of them or anything. I just don't want to be the only one from my old crowd that is there and has no one to dance with. Because they'd probably point it out, and each guy would politiely ask me to dance one dance with him, and then id be sitting around the rest of the time. I don't need a boyfriend, what i really need is just someone that i can be comfortable with and feel natural hanging around and dancing with. Thats all. Is that selfish of me? Or needy? I know that God could work in me by having me be alone at the wedding, but it would still be nice to have someone to sit with at least. One more thing to put on my prayer list- I knew it was coming, and I've been praying in preparation. Do I rsvp and say 2 or 1? I have a while 'cause the weddings not till jan 2. I think that my motives are pure in wanting this, and I don't think that i am jealous and needy. I guess I just have to pray that they continue to be so, and that God will help me to accept whatever happens. Man, I'm overdramatic when I'm tired.
Quote:"It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in posession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife." Jane austen - Pride and Prejudice (A book well worthy of reading, and a miniseries well worth seeing all 5 hours of, even if just for Colin Firth!)
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